Thursday, February 5, 2009

Kickin' It Old School

I want to start off with Amanda C's comment from the last blog... I too find myself trying to be the perfect mom... but what is that? When I put into perspective that there are children in the world with out the basic standards of living like food, clothing and shelter, I try to remember that while my children do not get to go to the park, museum, zoo, etc; everyday they are always Loved and taken care of. Deciding to be a stay at home mom was easy at first, and then I noticed a few things... 1. Getting ready did not happen everyday. I am all to comfortable lounging in my elastic wasted pants and t-shirts EVERYDAY... this needs to change. 2. The needs of my family are met before mine, and on most occasions this is ok, Most days this needs to change.

* Christina was a person before my husband and children came along and to be the best person for all 3 of them, I have to take care of, and nurture me, or essentially I'm letting them down. I am getting better at this, not great, but better.*

This is the Nugget, my nine month old needy nugget. She had a check up with the greatest Nurse Practitioner today... Patti Hellam at Locust Grove Pediatrics, in Locust Grove. You can find more info at We had a long conversation about weaning Addison off of Night Nursing. I was told from the beginning nursing during the night would be necessary until she was 9 months old, and now it's no longer necessary and she is awake every hour out of habit. Patti gave me the instructions I was waiting for, but dreading also... Let her Self Sooth... Self Sooth is code for Cry it Out. I have always been against it, I've tried it but it broke my heart so I stopped. With Addison, however, I have tried everything else to no avail. I cannot put her to sleep because she is used to nursing and SCREAMS relentlessly. I have tried:

1. Letting her cry it out while rocking her.

2. Letting her cry it out in her crib.

3. Letting Jesse put her to sleep.

4. Nursing her to sleep and laying her in her bed.

5. Nursing her to sleep and laying her in MY bed.

None of these have worked. So this is my last straw. Patti pointed out something that finally clicked: Addison needs to be more independent. I am doing a dis-service to both of us by letting her depend on me for this, which she can do herself. I will attempt it in the coming weeks. This is not going to make me a bad mom, but to allow my tiny little daughter to gain the comfort and confidence in her ability to sooth herself, she will need that confidence later in life. Please Pray.. I will undoubtedly be crying right along with her, crumbled at her bedroom door, but I need this for my sanity, I have not had a solid nights sleep in 9 months, I can no longer function, and I need focus for school. If you have any comments, advice, encouragement, I welcome it with open arms... Just remember us when you Pray.


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