2010 is going to be a big year for our family. For no specific reason, but one big thing is that Sugar Mama starts kindergarten. But I feel that in order for this year to be a big one there are some things that I would like to start/continue...
1. I have already taken some steps toward this one, but I'd like to take it further. In 2010 I am going to donate my time to a cause that I support fully. In a town very close to mine is a center that counsels women who are pregnant, but are considering abortion. It's important for this center to receive donations of items, money and time. Not only will this be helpful for the center it will be helpful for me as well. As a stay-at-home mom I sometimes feel like my entire person is wrapped up in my husband and children. They live individual lives outside of our house, but that is not always the case with me. School has helped, but at the end of the day, my graduating benefits everyone. This is an opportunity to share my time with women who need a shoulder, and I am excited.
2. I need to deepen my relationship with God. I've been saved a long time, since I was 7, and while I've been astray; I've always known he was there. The thing is that about 2 years ago, just 4 days before Mama J's husband died I stopped reading my bible everyday. After the funeral our house was inundated with people, I was pregnant with the Nugget, and then I went back to school and used nap time for study time. Being Saved/a Christian doesn't mean you have to read every day, but being in his word is helpful in the everyday. At night when I pray I start with something that my pastor taught me: with thanks. I start by thanking God for his many blessings and some where in the middle I fall asleep. How sad is that? Being in his word, and having an open, continuous dialogue is important, and I would like to be much better about it.
3. Weight has been an open conversation between us before. I'm not going to talk about pounds, only 2 things:
b. I have a high school reunion coming up in June, ugh can you imagine...
That's all on that subject.
3. I would like to start a small business. This is something I have been working on for a while and it's not as easy as it sounds. To make money you have to spend money.. we are a single income family and the Hubs is a wonderful provider for this family. At the end of the day there is not a lot of extra for stuff like materials. In my heart I know that it will come in time, and pray that in some way my small little business can be useful to shine God's light.
4. I've seen mentions of being a better wife/mother. It would be very egotistical of me to say that I do not need to improve in this area because I do. After hearing Mama/Mommy for the 50th time in an hour I'm ready to pull my hair out. When it's nap time and I don't have school I love nothing more than to lay on my couch and watch trashy tv, or ready a book of "garbage" as this man at the store called it today. A lot of times I feel like I should be doing something with Sugar Mama, like reviewing how to spell her name, phone number, etc., or teaching her new skills. I vow to do better in this arena in 2010 because the only break I take from school is between Fall and Spring. I go straight through over the summer so it looks like I won't have those lazy afternoons.
However, I also, as I posted on number 1, realize that I sacrifice A LOT of myself for my family. I am always last, no matter the need, and I'd like to find the balance in this situation.
5. I'd like to take the time. Have you ever been in a situation in Nursery at Church, the line at the grocery store, etc., when some one strikes up a mini conversation with you? I have and usually I give an awkward response and laugh until they are done talking. But I think that's why my witness has been lacking. No I won't walk up to a perfect stranger and jump right into the salvation conversation, but God's light will shine brighter and solo if you only give it the chance, well if you have it in you. I'd like to take that time to have those conversations and be a station for communication..that's my 2nd rhyme of the paragraph :) I also think that my friendships/relationship with other people will thrive. And at the end of the day it's about the love we all share...with each other because God, first gave us his.
I don't want to call these "resolutions" because they are not exclusive to 2010, and I don't resolve to do them. I recognize and acknowledge and will move forward.. what do you recognize and acknowledge?
Today I am Thankful for:
Recognition and Acknowledgement: Not just about the things that we need to change, but also the things others see in us. The other day I had a lengthy conversation about some decisions the hubs and I need to make with Mama J. She was so sincere and kind with her words it let me know that others do see my light...I just won't know it all the time :)
P.s. I see your lights and they are beautiful, thank you for sharing them with me (insert heart...the blog won't let me actually do it, but I give you one)